High Anxiety Day

Today my anxiety/ perfectionism is being a bit of a mosquito today. See, I have this plan. 

This plan includes organizing the house room by room. 

I’ve kept my mother apprised of this since, well, she’s finally ready to let a lot of crap go. She’s still holding onto things that, in her mind “could be used for gifts” or “are super valuable” — and yet they are unused for over 5 years. 

Let’s just say that clashes with my, “oh my God it hasn’t been used in 6 months and I have zero attatchment ew, get it away” philosophy. 

Anyway, I had a plan but last night I was talking to my mom and she started throwing more ideas out there as if we were brainstorming. Any non anxious person would be all, “what great ideas! I’m so happy we’re on the same cleaning and organizing page, we’ll totally kick ass at this over the coming months/ years.”

Sadly, my brain heard: OMG THIS NEEDS TO BE DONE RIGHT NOW

Aaaaand that’s where I’m at right now. 

Writing about it helps, as if the critical thinking sane side of my brain can hold roots and become real. 

So, yeah, maybe I just need to write down my goals a little smaller and I’ll get this project done. And clean like a badass. 

Side note: Can I just say how infuriating it was to see 99% of pictures of WOMEN cleaning when I put in “cleaning” in the photo search?!? It wasn’t until I adjusted the term to be “superhero cleaning” that it suddenly became 90% MEN. 

Sexism, alive and well, folks. Grrrrr. 


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