I have been struggling to even put a label on what I have been going through, because for me once I have a name I can start to dissect and “fix”.
But this isn’t a “fixing” situation.
This is a “darling, you have to ride through it all” situation.
Like I’ve said in previous posts, I’m all over the freaking place getting used to the med adjustment and the shit-storm of hormones that comes with being female during a certain time of terrifying expulsion. Between the two, let’s just say my self-care regime has gone pretty far down the toilet.
I’m forgetful, and now have to set alarms on my phone to remind me when I need to take a Xanax because OH MY GOD THE ANXIETY ATTACKS ARE BACK. It’s coming out as social anxiety presently. My normal coping methods of going out and pampering myself at my usual places are normally just the ticket to get me out the door and tip toe into civilization.
BUT OH MY GOD I CAN’T EVEN BRING MYSELF TO GET MY NAILS DONE. And holy shit they need some love. A pedicure is also in order, but that’s a tad lower on the scale of “GET THEE OUT OF THE HOUSE”
Does this post have a point? I feel like I’m rambling more than usual lately and I don’t really care.
Just, I dunno. Lemme know when this ends so I can get back to normal?