Hopes and Dreams

I’m feeling a bit on the punchy side of things today, which doesn’t help my anxiety AT ALL. It could be the wildfire that is blanketing our city, or it might even be my lack of sleep. 

Nope. It’s for sure my lack of sleep. 

Henceforth there shall be cute animal photos because I fucking feel like it, OK? 

Whenever I’m feeling anxious for “no reason” it’s kind of hard for me to breathe my way to complete calm. It’s always hidden, a subtle current that has me on alert at all times. 

Meds help, and then they don’t. 

It’s a weird dance I haven’t gotten the moves down right so shit unfolds clumsily sometimes. 

Sometimes have come a call in’ today. 

I wish I could say I did well and found progress, but no. I was a downright bitch. 

Think aggressive driving.

Think silently fuming at slow-movers at the craft store. 

Think self-abusive shouting (in my head) at myself for only having the energy to do 2 of the 5 things I had wished to do today. 

I’m not proud of myself today, but today isn’t over. 

I can turn this negativity around. 

I’m going to be nice to myself. 

I’m going to take a nap. 

The Lush: My actual dog, Bernadette.


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